COVID and Parenting
Single moms wear many hats and juggle A LOT. Single moms work, pay the bills, take care of the house, the car, get the kids to school and extracurriculars, there’s doctors appointments, and playdates… the list goes on! Let’s be honest- life for single moms has never been easy. As we all know, the COVID-19 pandemic brought many challenges and made it tough on everyone- especially single moms.
Now that there’s an end in sight to this pandemic and life is starting to go back to normal, we wanted to reflect on the last year and share what we have learned. This post will discuss some of the biggest lessons we have learned that have helped us get through these tough times.
Self Care
Self care for single parents is vital!! Engaging in a self-care routine has been clinically proven to reduce or eliminate anxiety and depression, reduce stress, improve concentration, minimize frustration and anger, increase happiness, improve energy, and more (Glowiak, 2020). Moms are selfless and put everyone above themselves. We all have that running to-do list in our head that seems a mile long. With a million things to accomplish you’re probably thinking “who has time for self care?” You need to make time because parenting is beautiful AND stressful and exhausting.
Moms need to take time to relax and recharge- you have earned it! If you are not your best self, then you are never going to be the best parent you can be. So, schedule out a time to do something enjoyable because guess what? That to-do list is still going to be there. The difference now is that you will be refreshed and recharged.
It Takes a Village
After this pandemic, I think we have all come to realize it takes a village to raise children! No one can do this alone. It’s ok to reach out to friends and family for help. Surround yourself with positive, uplifting people you can depend on. We all need help during these crazy tough times.
And don’t forget that Along The Way’s mission is to provide community, acceptance and hope
to women; it was formed to BE YOUR VILLAGE so call on us when you need support! We know that not every mother has a reliable family nearby or a supportive community and if you’re a single mother, it’s likely you don’t have a parenting partner — we are here to fill in these gaps!
Change Your Perspective
I think a lot of us experienced a shift in our perspective 1 or 2 times throughout this pandemic. It was filled with many ups and downs and we all tried to make the best of the situation. A lot of parents experienced a difficult adjustment but may have also felt grateful to be able to spend more time with their children. Many parents discovered a new appreciation for school teachers as they struggled
to help their kids stay on track academically but interspersed in the struggle, many parents have reported also being more involved in their school work and helping their children learn and grow.
I think the major lesson here is to change your perspective. The pandemic was filled with so many negative situations. Stop yourself from the negative thinking and try to come up with one thing that you're thankful for. In fact, if you can do this, you immediately set yourself up for success in one small and manageable way…after all, change in perspective and thought patterns is what the highly effective cognitive behavioral
therapy is built upon (Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research, 2019) — changing your thoughts means changing your life!
Major Policy Change
During the last year, many two parent families felt a smidge of the stress and struggles that single moms face everyday. The balancing act of virtual school and work left parents with more responsibility and less support. This shed some light on how single moms tackle this uphill battle everyday- pandemic or not!
Since these challenges were faced by every parent, we hope moving forward that this brought attention to the fact that our country needs to make major policy changes that can have a positive impact on single parents. We learned that access to affordable and quality childcare needs to be made a priority, and not just for first shift workers but those members of our communities who are working nights and weekends— the worker checking you out at the grocery store at 9pm, the CNA who cares for our elderly family member on the overnight shift at the nursing home, and the waitress who doesn’t get home until 11pm at our favorite local restaurant. When these members of our community have reliable, affordable & safe childcare, we all win!
Looking ahead- we hope this challenging year showed people a glimpse of the difficulties single moms face day in and day out. ATW continues to advocate policy change that will bring positive change to the lives of single moms and their family, and you can too by getting involved in a way that speaks to you!
Share what you have learned during this last hectic year in the comments!
References:
Glowiak, M. (2020, April 14). What is Self-Care and Why is it Important For You? Southern New Hampshire University. https://www.snhu.edu/about-us/newsroom/2019/04/what-is-self-care.
Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research. (2019, March 16). Cognitive behavioral therapy. Mayo Clinic. https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/cognitive-behavioral-therapy/about/pac-20384610.